Let's see, where do I begin to catch up on the past week
that I haven't written?
First of all, Seva is now two days short of three weeks
old. She's healthy, thank God. And she's growing, which is perceptible even
though I see her every day. And for that
I'm thankful too. I treasure those
moments when she's awake, alert, calm, and her eyes are open and she's looking
around. It's as if she's beginning to
take in her surroundings, even if her depth perception is not yet developed. I'm almost certain that she recognizes me, or
at least I hope she does. Jeannie and I
have really been blessed and I look forward to seeing Seva continue to grow and
develop into a little girl.
Speaking of changes, this week is the first week that [...]
is at its new location at the Cast Iron Building, 718 Arch Street. Although I had some doubts and misgivings
about moving from our previous location at 15th & Chestnut, I've been
pleasantly impressed with the new building.
The two main things that I miss are my view from the windows at 42 South
15th Street and the fact that my commute was simply a 15 to 20 minute
walk. Now I have to take the
17 bus and
I have just one window, behind me, that looks out to an opposing wall and a
parking garage. As a whole, though, the
office set-up provides more privacy and overall a lot more square footage for
the organization. Although I've lately
been critical of [...], I'll always give credit where credit is due, and in
making this move, and actually making it happen, management has done a very
good job. With that being said, I'm
still looking forward to going out on paternity leave in mid-June.
After finishing
The Old Man and the Sea by
Ernest Hemingway,
I began reading
Blindness by
José Saramago.
I'm nearly halfway through now.
It's been a good book so far, but I'm really wondering how it's going to
end, whether all the characters will be cured of their white blindness and
whether the author will explain the cause of the epidemic.
Right now it's raining again. There was already about an inch or more of
standing water in our patio from a ton of rain that fell throughout the day and
night yesterday. What can we expect
though, it's springtime. As I was
walking to the bus stop this morning, I noticed that little leaves are starting
to emerge from the buds on the trees.
Spring is definitely here. After
fall, this may be my favorite time of year.
There's just something fresh and exciting about springtime, finally to
be able to get out of the house after winter is over.
I have so much hope for the future. I feel like I've been through a couple
negative challenging periods recently, first with Ileana and most recently at
work. But I feel that these tests were
setting me up for the next step, something different, something better. In the case of post-Ileana, I'm now married
to Jeannie and we have our baby Seva, and in spite of our occasional challenges
and growing pains, we're happy. In the
case of post-[...], the chapter is yet to be written. I can only hope for a similar storyline, a
positive trajectory in the direction of a better me and happier, healthier
future.
I was telling Jeannie earlier this evening over dinner how
so many of my clients have been so happy and congratulatory for the birth of
Seva. It's really heartwarming. I should keep it in mind that being a lawyer
comes with its intangible rewards, of which this kind of thing is right up
there at the top of the list. This kind
of genuine gratitude and recognition makes me think that being a lawyer isn't
the problem, it's just where I'm at now.
This past Saturday, with the weather being nice, I thought
on a whim that it would be great to go out to shoot some hoops. I mentioned it to Jeannie that she should
pack up Seva and come with me to the basketball court at 18th &
Catharine. We stopped by the YMCA,
hoping that I could pump up my basketball a little bit, but the Y was closed,
so I had to go with a mostly-filled ball, which wasn't so bad. When I got to the court there was another
kid, probably in his late teens, who got there right around the same time. We shot around at one end of the court for a
while until another couple guys came by, probably in their early to mid
twenties. About a half hour into
shooting around, we got a game of 3-on-3 going at the other end of the
court. I told Jeannie before the game
started that I was sure that I'd get winded.
And my prediction came true. I
had bursts of athleticism and flashes of some good offensive drives to the
hoop, but overall my lung capacity and poor cardiovascular condition held me
back from playing anywhere near top form.
I'll tell you, though, even though my body felt it for at least the next
couple days, it was totally worth it, I had a lot of fun just playing ball,
doing something for the heck of it, but still competing. It was great.
I hope to play again this coming weekend.
Another highlight from this past weekend, Sunday I think,
was looking through a lot of the poetry that I've written and saved on my
computer. Some of it made me grimace in
embarrassment, but there were other poems that brought back feelings and
memories that made me laugh and smile. I
know that many times there's no telling when inspiration will inspire, but I'm
certain that there has to be a certain degree of intentionality necessary to
write, especially when it comes to poetry.
I say that as a preface to the statement that I'd like to come around at
some point and start writing poetry again.
I can't say that I'm any kind of master, but if I can make my future
self laugh and smile, and maybe some others laugh and smile too, then it'll be
worth it.
Reflecting on the paragraph before last, I realize that I
love competing when it's fun. And I hope
to get back to that point when it comes to law.
It's fun to have fun and it's not fun to not have fun. I'd like to have fun and be happy.
Going back to the topic of memories, I like to think of
moments from the road. The other morning
(perhaps this morning?) I was thinking of being on the bus with Jeannie
somewhere in upstate New York on the way to Montreal. I remember being on the phone with Pito and
Jess and looking out the window at the colorful trees on the side of the road
and feeling excited about heading back to Montreal for a long weekend. I remember sitting in the passenger seat as
Jeannie drove the rental car straight from the San Diego International Airport
south on I-5 to the Mexican border and down along the coast to Ensenada. I remember the beauty of looking out and down
the Pacific cliffs to the ocean below and the winding road along the sleepy
Mexican coast, the hills looking really dry to our left-hand side. I remember sitting in a bus seat in the
middle of the dark night somewhere in Laos, listening to my iPod, including the
song "Light of the Moon" by
Scapegoat Wax, which I'll never
forget. I remember the bus stopped
randomly at some point on the back road to let everyone out to piss and shit on
the side of the road, without any light (except from the moon and stars) and
without any cover. It was one of those
experiences that could never be truly captured on a camera, but yet it remains
an indelible memory of life on the road.
