San Jose, Costa Rica -- evening

Here I am, once again in Costa Rica. Back where this journal began. I guess maybe that's how life operates: in cycles. The biggest difference, I suppose, is that I'm two years older. Of course I don't really know if I feel like I'm 27 years old as compared to 25 years old. But then again, when I came last time, I was drinking a shitload of alcohol. Life was a party for me then. Anything that happened in between drinking sessions was simply an intermission. Now I've become greatly accustomed to not drinking at all, or at least drinking very infrequently. Every once in a blue moon, I get the itch to drink my ass off, but I think that's okay as long as it really is once in a blue moon. I drank a bunch of Concha y Toro red wine last night; it gave me just enough of a kick. It was just what the doctor ordered and gave Tia Zahyra's crazy comments an extra dimension.

However, it seems that even if I wanted to go out, it really wouldn't be happening. That's because Carlos is working from 10am to 10pm, 7 days per week. That leaves him with no time and even less energy to hit the town. I don't even expect to see him until the reunion on the 25th.

A second difference from my last visit is perhaps just as important as the first. That is, I'm here with Mita this time, whereas I was alone last time. In other words, last trip was mine, this trip is hers. Of course, my disposition resents any type of impediment on my independence. For better or for worse, I've resigned myself to keeping my mouth shut and just going with the flow. Only when I'm in a one-on-one situation do I really engage in conversation. That'll likely be the status quo until Cherise arrives here on January 1st. I'll keep my spending to a bare minimum until then, then we'll blow it out for 6 days, 5 nights.

Being here has already helped me to appreciate the relationship. I'll be really happy to see Cherise on the 1st. But for now, I'll hold off on that aside.

To continue on the second point above, I also has much less time here and much less money. For all intents and purposes, that means I'm basically attached to Mita, at least until Cherise gets here. Its tough, too, because I can only take so much of Mita at a time. She never seems to be paying attention to what she's doing, it seems to me that she sometimes puts on a 'clueless' act for whatever reason, and she's constantly trying to put on a comedy show. I guess she's having fun, and that's great. But I can only take so much.

Enough about that, though. The reality is that this trip will be different. Besides seeing family and getting some time in a comfortable climate, this trip is a much-needed break from Temple Law, which sucks most of my energy, and not even because of the studies. The social atmosphere at Temple is still so repressive to me that it drains me sometimes. I began to feel a tiny bit more comfortable at the end of the semester. Nevertheless, I definitely needed a break. I have to make a concerted effort to keep up with my work, especially early in the semester, and set an early standard of class participation, albeit at a moderate level. I need to be more assertive at the outset. I think that will make me more accessible to my classmates. And my confidence will feed off of both the cause and the effects.

For now, though, I'll try to chill out down here. Law school has only crossed my mind a couple of times, and only to give me appreciation of my temporary repose. So despite any difficulties (e.g. American Airlines losing our luggage for one day) and annoyances, this trip is just what I needed.

In the short-term, I'm looking forward to the 25th to see more family. Then I'll look forward to what will hopefully be a good 31st. Then, of course, I'll really be excited to see Cherise. Of course I'm already looking forward to seeing her.

And finally, to review really quickly, today we drove all the way into the mountains of Alajuela, near Volcan Poas, to pick-up Tia Tere, then drive back to the town-center of Alajuela. I should say that I drove the whole day. For what it was worth, it felt good to actually be in control of something. And I got to see much of the countryside.

Alright, I'll write again soon, probably tomorrow, since writing gives me a chance to be left alone to my own thoughts and reflections. This and reading allow me my only real methods of enjoying the independence that I normally enjoy back home.