It's kind of an eerie feeling. It's almost as if time has stopped, at least temporarily, as oxymoronic as that is. I've been alone here in Tia Zahyra's house for about the past two hours. Besides the phone ringing just once, it has been a nearly uninterrupted stagnation.
Of course, as I write this though, Mita and Tia Zahyra are walking in the door. Mita is a little upset for some reason: either because Jessica may be alone this Christmas, or that Jessica is not with us here, or that Mita is not here with Jessica, any or all of the above. For better or for worse, I have to admit that I'm surprised; Mita seemed so wrapped up in being here, barely paying me any attention. I figured that everything left in the United States was for the most part out of sight, out of mind.
But when I think about it, I believe Mita's putting on something of a front, for the purpose of convincing herself that Costa Rica is better than the United States in every possible way. But under that surface, there are apparently deeper currents. I remember being depressed when I spent Christmas here in Costa Rica two years ago. It was very difficult to be apart from my close family and friends for Christmas, and it made it even more difficult to be in a warm climate for the holidays. I felt like a stranger in a strange land. It's not a good feeling.
I hope for Jessica's sake that Pito is spending Christmas with her. So far I've been pretty stoic about the holidays this time around. Perhaps I'm putting up my defenses after my experience two years ago. Or maybe it's easier because Mita is here. I don't think it's really the latter, but I could be wrong. Or maybe it's the difference that in only 8 days Cherise will be here. I think that makes a huge difference; to look forward to something in the short-term.
Well, I should have some coffee and socialize now that there's some life here, some reassurance of time and reality.
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